Since leaving New York City in October of last year I have had a very hard time finding my motivation for different aspects of my life. Whether that is working out, getting my career started, going back to school, the list goes on and on. I started to let the weight of all of the things I needed to figure out crush me and it felt like I was suffocating. It felt like I would never get it figured out. I let myself fall into this crazy pit of despair and chose to ignore the things that were important to me. I stopped taking Luna for runs, I didn’t work for about 3 months, I neglected friendships that are very important to me and it took awhile but now, almost a year later I am finally starting to get back to who I want to be.
Most people who know me, know that I love to perform. Singing, acting, the works and it’s truly the only thing that makes me happy. In December of last year I took initiative and auditioned for Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat at Plaza Theater Company and like a gift from God I got cast. That is where I finally started to get some of my motivation back to do what I wanted to do. There are pivotal moments in my life that I can look back on and say they had a huge impact on me and this is one of those moments. Being in Joseph and being a part of that cast was so wonderful because it not only brought me true friends but it gave me confidence in learning choreography and it gave me back some of the passion I had lost for performing.
I believe it is taking little leaps of faith, like for me auditioning at a theater I had never been too, to make changes in your life. If you never take chances, then the things in your life that you want changed will never change. Being in theater has definitely taught me how to put myself out there only to be rejected over and over and over again, but when that call comes telling you that they want you, it is truly the best feeling in the world. Find what you want in life by taking baby steps toward your goals. Book an audition or put yourself up for a promotion, OR just change jobs entirely because you hate the one you are in. Life is so short and I think we all get so wrapped up in the mundaneness of life that we forget to live. There is so much happening in the world around us that we all need to take more advantage of. I know that it isn’t that easy and we all have to have jobs but that doesn’t mean that you can’t take those small steps toward something exciting that will make your life just a little bit happier.
I know that I plan on continuing to take those leaps of faith and see where it leads me. I am so excited to see what the next year has in store for me and everyone around me!